I got invited to an anti-Superbowl party yesterday.

Neighbor: Hey girlie, watcha doin’ next Sunday night?
ME: Watching the Superbowl
Neighbor: (scoffs) Well, my girlfriends and I are having an Anti-Bowl party. We are fed up with men who year after year act like we don’t exist when the “big game” is on. We’re having cocktails, and will play some board games, and are going to come up with tricks that can get our boyfriends - well those of us who have boyfriends - to pay attention to us whenever sports are on.
ME: O_O 


Why the hell do women make such a big deal about having to compete with ESPN? I remember once hearing my neighbor say that her boyfriend isn’t allowed to call her during Dancing With the Stars, but this man can’t enjoy a couple of hours with a few of his heroes? Please. I liked how she mentioned that some of the attendees don’t have boyfriends. Gee, I wonder why? Tricks to get your man to pay attention? Really? Stop being jealous of the NFL and go find yourself a hobby. Your man has one… or better yet, try and actually LEARN something about the game. I don’t know a man who wouldn’t want their woman to genuinely take interest in something they are passionate about. 

Sigh. Women like these KILL me.

I’d love to have a boyfriend who loves sports. Why? Well, not only would we have something in common (cause I love sports too), but because I’d know where he’d be most nights. He’ll be on my couch getting uptight with the ref for calling that bogus foul on Kobe, or sharing his excitement over how there is a little over a month to go before the first pitch of the season. Sure, there are particular teams I don’t care to watch and if my boo were watching them I’d do something to occupy my time. I’d bring him a cold beer and give him a quick kiss on the neck and go back to whatever it is I’m doing. During halftime I’d come in and flirt a little, hand him another soda or a plate and keep it moving. Our relationship, as it pertains to sports, would be a great one. 

I wonder how long it will be before she invites me to her “newly single” party.